My husband has to write a paper on stem cells for school. Ordinarily I am against using embryonic stem cells, for using cord blood cells and amniotic stem cells -- for the producing of healing tissues, not people, that is. Now that I have three kids under the age of five, I've changed my mind. Cloning a few copies of me sounds like a great idea. And while we're at it, let's get all eugenics on my ass and make some quality improvements: more patience, less anxiety, a more playful, present attitude toward life and its eventualities. And while we're at it, how about a smaller nose, slightly taller stature and a better memory for details. And can we get rid of those stretch marks, please?
Aside from the fact that a clone wouldn't actually me, if I could change all or some of those features, would I still be myself? After all, I'm trying to become more patient, less anxious, more playful and present in the midst whatever happens -- so what would be wrong with a quick fix? What would I miss? I could wax on spiritually about missing the process, missing God meeting me in my inadequacy, frankly but I'm too tired for that and it wouldn't be that interesting. So you tell me, what would I miss?
I'll tell you what I miss. I miss my toddler, whose head has suddenly gotten literally bigger since his sister was born. I miss my big girl, who thrives with one-on-one. I miss my baby whenever someone else is holding her, and then I miss being able to have both hands free to create. I ache to be more than I am.
Lord help me accept the things I cannot change and the gutsy creativity to change the things I can. And help me to be patient with the things that take time to break, melt, mold and recreate.
Emergence
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